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Dress Me Up 3 is not very good. If you are looking for chicks dressed up in sexy outfits while they get down and dirty, you are going to be very disappointed. Not only are the choice roles incredibly cliche but the outfits are off before you will be able to even get an erection. What's the point? I don't know but the sex won't give you any relief. It's by the books, uninspired and for the most part, below average.
The movie starts off in the locker room with two dudes who I presume were just working out at the gym. At first I thought the fine folks at Rancho were messing with me by slipping in some gay smut because the opening few moments definitely gave off that vibe that the guys were about to pounce on each other but luckily a striking blonde appears in a referees uniform to save the day. Cameron, a plain but "hot" young lady takes on the gentlemen right there in the shower room but unfortunately, she is naked within seconds of having a penis in her mouth. The action is ok, I guess. She mostly goes for the suck and fuck route but for exactly one position she decides to take it to the next level and do some anal. And for a moment or two gets DP'd. This is all towards the beginning of the scene too. Something must have happened behind the scenes that kept her from continuing the third hole play. I guess we will never know!
Scene two brings us to the tennis courts where three porn stars are discussing god knows what in the empty arena. Once again it's the woman getting outnumbered but this time our main girl isn't afraid to take a beating in her arse. Yep, Lea Magic brings us the ONLY "multiple wanking potential" scene of the dvd. The big titted brunette looks great being DP'd a number of times and by the end of it, she is covered in man juice from head to toe.
Next up is the incredibly gorgeous Tera Joy playing a sexy jockey. She keeps most of her outfit on during the foreplay but once again, she is in her birthday suit before we know it. It doesn't really matter though because the only really good part WAS the foreplay. Tera gives head like a mad woman but has absolutely no spark in the sack. Average to almost boring shagging is what she delivers here. No anal either. What a shame.
Anastasia (ballerina) and Michelle Martin (umm, she doesn't really play a role) continue the mediocrity in their scenes by following Miss Joy's lead by going through the motions. I found Michelle to be almost entertaining while she was on top but I wouldn't call one good position a success. As for Anastasia, I have two words to describe her: plain and dull.
Francesca Fellucci finishes out the movie in the boxing ring. I didn't find her attractive in the slightest but at least she gave some solid effort. Her male co-star definitely had a good time as he shot his load multiple times throughout the match! It was actually pretty annoying that he couldn't keep his load in for more than five minutes at a time.
So ya, Lea Magic is the lone star of this movie. Pick something else up in the New Sensations catalog. They only have about 15,000 amazing movies to choose from. "Dress Me Up 3" doesn't deserve to be in anyone's private collection.
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DVD Features Include: photo gallery | trailers
Running Time: 129 minutes | Production Date: 01-01-2010
Cooter the counting cactus says that you are smutmonkey number 748 to read this Rancho Review.
DATE POSTED: 2010-05-28