by
Frankenmeat Whitecastle
I had high hopes for this one because it looked mysterious. And French. And the back says "Fetishist trip into the realm of terror and sex." That sounds like a perfect evening to me. Unfortunately there's no real follow-through on this one - there's not a whole lot of sex during the movie's 74 minutes and definitely no "terror." I mean, it's kinda sexy but the English voice-overs ruined it for me. I forgot to check if watching it in French was an option because then it really would have been mysterious. The main chick who plays Claudine, I THINK her name is Ovidie (though that's not on the box anywhere), is hot in an exotic sorta way. She looks awesome in cotton panties and a tank top - a look you unfortunately don't get to see much of. Mostly she's in bondage gear wearing a red wig which makes her look like a stony-faced S & M Betty Rubble. That's not right. What was Barney's wife's name? Doesn't matter. No wait, I think that's right. So, the main woman is good to look at which is promising - there aren't many other women to be had. Most of the movie, especially the sex scenes are pretty artsy, like a music video, dig? OK, so this is just too weird not to write out. Claudine fucks a man in the ass with a glass dildo for 20 seconds and then puts a gas mask on him and dunks his head in a big fish tank. He has a heart attack and dies. Claudine drags him down the stairs (in a carpet no less) and the cops come. After that I lost track of stuff but, OK, OK, Claudine picks up a black dude to fuck and it's kinda sexy but the guy can't get a hard-on and the scene ends with Claudine kicking him out because of this. Then the cop gets fucked by two women in a fetish club who are carefully disgused as dalmations! This is the most sex-sex scene in the movie involving both anal and vaginal sex with...a comeshot (the first in the movie)! Next we've got Claudine having sex with a couple. Claudine fucks the chick in the can with a strap-on and then the man helps DP the lady. Not bad. And lastly, Claudine briefly fucks the cop guy (i think) but...they both get shot? The movie ends with a man in bondage gear running down the street. Heh. I give this a 3. That's probably more than it deserves but there's some real potential here somewhere and I like the main character (in cotton panties anyway!).
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DVD Features Include: making of
Running Time: 74 minutes | Production Date: 01-01-2004
Cooter the counting cactus says that you are smutmonkey number 2659 to read this Rancho Review. DATE POSTED: 05-02-2004
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