Sometimes a flick comes along that defines a genre in porn. If you have a penchant for bukkake or cum swallowing, Brandon Iron's Baker's Dozen 2 sets the bar. It's difficult to say how BD2 comes together so well, but it's easy to say why: every chick is hot and just loves cum. These girls are way past the curious phase of liking cum, they get really turned on by it and it shows. Luckily, Brandon does the camera work and does not miss a beat.
With the amount of heat and flying sperm 'round this set, it's a fuckin' miracle he pulls off the shots he does. I'd be standing in a quivering puddle of my own juices, if I was on this set and that's just why Brandon is the boss and makes the big bucks. I could have christened my own sperm bank with the number of times I've watched Trista Post's scene with Tony Ribas and the 12 international gene pool donors. In fact, except for Eden's sperm-drenched gangbang in Major Fucking Whore, I haven't corrupted myself to any other scene as much, in recent adult history. Why, you ask? Right from the get go, she sits on a big couch with a see-through top and pink tartan miniskirt, inviting the men to glaze her face.
As Trista rubs her pussy to a visibly moist froth, she keeps great eye contact and lays down the dirtiest series of sperm whore lines, before she coaxes every load out by hand and mouth, with almost professional ease, alternately gulping, stroking, and slurping the bloated pink heads of every man in the room.
Trista's Irish lass looks, her soft puffy nipples, and (later) those cum-smeared bloodshot green eyes tell the story, all their own. She's looks like Julianne Moore's Amber Waves in Boogie Nights, only sluttier and definitely, much spermier. In fact, iafd.com tells me that Juliann Moore is her other stage name. Go figure, my other stage name is Dirk Diddler, I just didn't show up that day, Brandon....
She's bewitching as she takes her time and deep throats her way through the blowbang part, choking, panting and slurping with her tongue attached to about two or three stringers at once, and you'll cum instantly. If you then watch about a dozen faceless men of all different colors launch milky yellow-white floods of splooge into every crevice of her face, hair and eyes, you'll cum harder. After that deluge of thick penis nectar, you get to watch as she lovingly scoops and eats the thick glops of multiracial seed, from all around her face and then, without a moments hesitation or cleanup, gets led by her hair back to the couch just to have her petals parted and fucked hard in RCG and a sweet piledriver gaping anal by Tony Ribas. With so much sperm dripping down her face and body into her crotch, you'll cum so long, you'll swear to never jerkoff to another girl again. Well, at least not until tomorrow night.
Porn doesn't get any better than this scene, it is a life-changing religious event in porn, like the immaculate conception, the birth of the baby Jesus, the crucifiction, and the resurrection all at once, and all rolled up into one long multiple orgasm. Phew! I'm probably the only person in the world to ever say that about a porno, so put that in your Google pipe and smoke it. Make it through that experience and you might be cleansed again by the teenie dreamgirl slut, Taylor Rain. Taylor is like the teen porn version of Parker Posey, the kind of airhead, skinny party girl who within seconds of meeting a guy, like at the bowling alley, has her tiny ass wrapped around his dick, and buried balls deep in the men's room, with a line out the door, waiting their turn.
In BD2, Taylor's jet black hair is sprayed lots more to be extra sticky, which you actually see done in the extras, so you won't confuse her with the uptown girl version she presents in Just Over Eighteen 3. She's in a donut hole slutfest today and she needs your glazing vote. Taylor is so thin that when she gives Julian his blowjob it looks as big as her forearm, stretching open her mouth. Taylor then gets rolled on her back into a fuck donut as he screws and anals her, with those long skinny legs flying everywhere.
Watching Taylor do that kind of deep anal is an intense, soul-cleansing experience, amplified by the rattling of her really skinny frame. In fact, you can even see her vital organs moving around her stomach as he gapes her in anal RCG. After she a2m's his load, she lights a cig to blow a line of guys. Thank you, Brandon, for letting me know about this special free offer, I'll take it from here.
Boy, this girl likes to suck lots of cock too and within minutes, the men surround her as she works them in a frenzied circle jerk, so there is no escape from the launching of load after goopy load across her face, hair, and shoulders. Thank god someone called Taylor Cross and Alex Divine to lick her clean off, 'cause I would have had to have another religious experience if she got fucked while still spermy, but no dice. Remember, this is the chaser scene from Trista's, so more sperm glaze is on the menu.
Alex and Taylor (Cross) do another blowbang with 12 more gloppy semen loads to share their wonderful protein dessert! Missy Monroe and Manuel Ferrara are in someone's desert home, where some hot anal is about to happen. Missy plugs her mouth up with his fat cock and he rewards her with sodomy. Lots of it until she gapes big. Missy only gets hotter having been opened up and goes outside so the hot desert wind can blow across her wrecked sphyncter ring. Kami Andrews and porn freak Julie Knight join her to attend the line of turgid cocks for fluffing and ball sucking for Missy's protein glazings. Many men unload their seed onto Missy's face and she's just lovin' it as Kami and Julie get their nourishment licking it off. Missy needs more batter, so more men oblige and sperm her again. Freakin' HOT!
There are even more great sperming and fucking scenes in the extras, with a great gang bang photoshoot with Trista and her newly opened cookie. Unh! Sorry about that. I guess that makes 90 loads launched. 5 kleenexes is not even close to enough! This one is a keeper, even if you become a priest and find religion, stash it in your collection box and never let it go!
Here's what other reviewers had to say:
Well, it all starts off with a simple ass slaying of sexy ol' Taylor Rain; then the mayhem begins. Shot after shot of man juice on pretty faces until they are unrecognizable is what this flick is all about. It's some crazy shit and definitely not for everyone. I happen to be one of the people who aren't particularly fond of the twenty guys on one lil’ chick deal but hey, I can still recognize a well put together porno flick even if I don't dig the concept (I think I've reviewed enough smut to have the ability to see when a director knows what he’s doing) Brandon Iron loves to see hot porn babes covered in billions of sperm and I guess there’s a lot of porn viewing folk out there who love it too. “A Good Source Of Iron” and “Bakers Dozen” are Mr. Iron’s babies, I guess.
Taylor Rain, Taylor Cross, Trista Post, Alex Divine and Missy Monroe (Julie Knight and Kami Andrews are special guests to help out Missy) are the super sluts featured on this disc. They participate in their own scenes and assist each other by being cum eating helpers by sharing each batch of man chowda. It’s a spectacle to say the least and a little vomit inducing if you don't like this type of thing. BUT, if you like your women looking like a glazed donut, I guess you'll be in heaven. I mean, Trista Post even after being glazed continues on to get a one on one shagging without bothering to take off her newly applied “makeup”. These girls aren't pulling a Krystal Steal and getting cleaned up as soon as they can. These chicks are hardcore! They actually enjoy what their doing…or at least the healthy paycheck that I'm sure they received.
Excellent flick. Each slut gets a long line of men to snack on. Brandon Iron puts his own twist on this bukkake DVD and it’s pretty unique to say the least. Let's just say for the last time, if you dig this sick and twisted stuff, pick it up! The scenes are super long, the cast is hot (minus the SUPER loose Missy Monroe) and it's well shot. I give it Four stars.
Does BAKER'S DOZEN 2 sound like it's
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DVD Features Include: behind the scenes | bonus footage | cum shot recap | photo gallery | previews | tease
Running Time: 127 minutes | Production Date: 10-20-2004
Cooter the counting cactus says that you are smutmonkey number 3412 to read this Rancho Review.
DATE POSTED: 09-12-2005