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SUN, BEACH AND SEX
SUN, BEACH AND SEX

-from Private Pictures

Rancho Rating: ****
Director: Alessandro del Mar

Starring: Alexa May, Jennifer, Kathy Anderson, Lora Croft, Nikoletta, Reka, Tera Bond, Vanessa Hill, Veronica Da Souza

4 kleenexes
Scooby Doo - A XXX Parody


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by Buff Punzlif

This movie – and I do mean movie (it has a plot!) – claims to have won the 2003 Brussels Erotic Festival’s coveted (?) Best Director award; yet the back of the generically-fashioned cover reveals a production date of late 2004. Other than that not making any sense, I don’t doubt it won any such award. Usually when I sit down to “review” a porno, its a ten or fifteen minute fuck session with little or no dialogue beyond the regular hilarious fare, so coming across (not cumming across) a dirty movie with a bit of lighthearted story and halfway-decent acting behind it is a rare pleasure. Tony, our protagonist played by the ruling Horst Baron, “wants to take the trip of his life to the tropics” and in a bout of infidelity “has booked his ticket with a very special agency that guarantees him as much sex as his body can take for two weeks.” That bit on the back of the packaging pretty much describes everything you get. In the first sex-scene (you can navigate through the dry parts to get to the juicy heart of the flick), Tony fucks the secretary at the travel agency, and three positions later gets on with the rest of his journey. Arriving at the Private Tropical island, Tony meets the one woman he’ll screw his way through hell to fuck. Well, maybe not hell, but four or five pretty attractive bitches, anyway. I can hardly blame him, she’s Hungarian, half like me. Rest assured, they do hook up, but its off-camera (and really the only flaw in an otherwise epic tale of sex and more sex). Two other fellows make appearances separate from the main character, and there seem to be whores aplenty around every corner of the fabled resort. Shaved and nearly always naked, they take it in the veritable trifecta of holes. But something fishy is afoot in paradise… On counts of technical merit, the movie is pretty top-of-the-line, with crystal clear audio, defined video, and actual directorial talent. Alessandro Del Mar even makes a cameo at the end, perhaps in typical style for the series (this, at number 16, is the first I’ve seen of it). Except for the boom-mic operator’s huge boner, the crew threw together a polished, satisfying shoot. The DVD is produced with high standards as well, and the menus can take you straight to the nasty almost immediately. Be cautious, however, as viewing the movie solely by scene will cost you the opportunity to take in the silly story. But maybe not – I mean, it’s a porno, not a convoluted indy film some guy made in his mom’s basement. In any case, the fucking, acting, and production are all higher than I would expect in a modern-day show of skin. * * * * p.s. Congratulate me on the completion of my first review for RanchoCarne!

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DVD Features Include: about private | bios | cast profiles | chapters | credits | direct access to chapters | direct chapter access | fully interactive menus | girls profile | girls profiles | languages | multiple foreign languages | photo gallery | photoboo | photobook | photogallery | photo


Running Time: 90 minutes | Production Date: 09-20-2004

Cooter the counting cactus says that you are smutmonkey number 3082 to read this Rancho Review.
DATE POSTED: 07-01-2005


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