Despite it's lame name, Exposed makes for a good night on the couch. If any porno in the world is compatible with your wife or girlfriend, Exposed is probably the one. Leave the beer in the fridge and get out the champagne.
Exposed is downright dreamy. That's the best word I can think of for the languid, mood-lit dozen scenes that grace this tape. Every blowjob, every cumshot feels slow-motion and the groans from the couples are turned down so low the passion sounds underwater. Is it art? Probably not, but definitely artsy. Too artsy. . .well, maybe, but I couldn't find much to complain about as far as the scenery was concerned. The shaved twats and tight tits look great in a myriad of environments - everything from a green interior garden to a rubber room to a photographer's darkroom (on fire, no less!).
You'll find a lot of boasting about Exposed's "original musical score." I'm here to tell you that it sounds like, uh, pretty typical porn music. Maybe a little better produced than normal, but it's still synth crap. Sometimes I wished it would go away as it's very persistent. Continuing with the negatives, every scene looks like a music video (I kept expecting band members to crash through the sheetrock with guitars). That isn't a bad thing for most of the scenes, but a couple of them are sort of flashy and quickly cut. It starts to get a little lame (and sickening) when the screen blips from black and white to color to inverted color to out-of-focus to a blue filter. I mean: ARTSY!
While hardcore fans will be left out in the cold (no DP, no deep-throat, no gapping hungry nasties, and only one anal scene with a small dildo), there's still plenty of sex that your girl will dig the hell out of. It's pretty standard: guy on girl, girl on girl and girl masturbating. You've seen it all before. But she hasn't. I won't run through all the scenes (too many) but here's a couple of notables: an angel-winged couple rocks the alter of a cobwebby church, Kylie Ireland and her Dominatrix ho buddy do a bit of softcore punishment on their little blonde friend, and hot blonde Breena gets hosed down with cold water on a smoky stage (good thing she's wearing her rubber dress). In the best scene, Monica Sweetheart gets it on with some dude in an expensive looking room. As I said, bust out the champagne, smile and wait for the gooey finale.
There's not a single word of dialogue to spoil this one. Just a loose story revolving around photographer Kylie Ireland obsessing about the people she's photographed. Maybe a little boring in spots and as noted, some of the scenes are duds, but I'm still ranking this pretty highly as a good couples film. And loosen up with some alcohol. That always helps.
Does NIC ANDREWS EXPOSED sound like it's
right up your alley? Buy it on
DVD
Cooter the counting cactus says that you are smutmonkey number 3094 to read this Rancho Review.
DATE POSTED: 02-26-2002
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