I'm not sure why I picked up this title to review. Could it be that I'm such a sucker for skinny, small titty talent like Courtney Simpson, Sasha Know, and Jeannie Marie Sullivan that I would watch them suction cup their pussies for no real reason? Yup, I admit that I would. Sure, the camerawork is annoyingly bad, the nonerotic tease sessions go on too long, and the set is worse than a fraternity living room during Spring Break. It's just a bizarre little fetish movie with some really hot chicks, doing bad pussy experiments. Ok, Courtney gives a leisurely blowjob to Brandon Iron filmed from PPPOV (Pumping Pussy Point of View). Once the pump comes off, my guess that artificially meaty pussy really needs a DPP or an airtight scenario, but nope. Just Brandon spending a lot of time working on her pussy and smelling her feet. Whatever. Courtney's pussy looks more comfortable to poon, like the cushiony ride from the backseat of a Rolls Royce limo, instead of maybe, the cushiony ride of a Caddy. Brandon fucks her in missionary, but she doesn't cum or squirt so what's the diff, guys? The view of her in RCG is fun to watch, because she's a horny pussy ho, but without a few more cocks to share the Courtney Simpson Experience, it's like: "if a tree falls in the woods" kinda thing, just more fun to watch.
Sasha Knox is a real cutie with a horny, experimental side, but (damn) is Rod Fontana ugly. She (again) gives us that softcore tease of those perfect b cup breasts, but all you ultraperves are just waiting to wank off to that stupid pussy pump. Once he pumps her vag to kinda a big fat rubbery red, he licks and eats it and makes her ready to suck his dick!? Ok, he does fuck her a bunch, slow like an old man would but thankfully, I don't have to look to his face or hairless man ass anymore. Damn, why Rod? What was wrong with Brandon or Tony?
Sonia is next and she has a decent scene for non-perves, thanks to Donny Long, who looks at least like he might be turning her on with his looks. After he puffs it into a meaty sandwich, they fuck vigorously in missionary and CG. She's sweet to with smallish pointy tits and a cute face, squirting a couple of ropes into her mouth and hair.
Tony Tedeschi fucking Adrianna Faust now puffy pussy is badly filmed either too close in or too far, it's like watching sex either through a peephole on a door, across the room, or sitting atop Tony T's testicles. Adrianna's unreal titties are natural looking (I hope they still are) with big nipples, but watching his saggy balls clanging into her new puffiness, even in RCG (the best part of the scene) to the non-existent pussy cumshot, just lost my interest.
Jeannie Marie's tease is kinda schoolgirl cute, like in a real bedroom with that awesome ass and naturally puffy pussy, and she admits to liking rape scenes (in the BTS). She prepares the pussy and the pump by herself and her skinny legs up in the air (compared to Rod's lumpy bald head, it's much better that way). Valentino offers to help and removes her socks, then gives her a foot rub with his uncircumcised dick. Watching Jeannie give him head with that pump around was kinda exciting, but seeing her remove the appliance, after her pudenendum has turned beet red and about four inches high was much better. He spits on it and gives it some moisture and slaps it, before he eats it and fucks it hard in spoon and mish, while grabbing those perfectly small titties. I think she cums too and then he blows a messy load onto her face. Yes! Why can't all the scenes be this hot?! 3 Kleenexes for a couple of solid scenes and a bizarre puffy pussy fetish done mostly right.
Does HONEY, WE BLEW UP YOUR PUSSY 8 sound like it's
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DVD Features Include: behind the scenes | bonus footage | message from ron jeremy | previews
Running Time: 100 minutes | Production Date: 06-28-1905
Cooter the counting cactus says that you are smutmonkey number 1410 to read this Rancho Review.
DATE POSTED: 2007-02-17